Yes i have considered the consequences, and i didnt start right away. I have thought long and very hard. Her health started going bad 4 yrs ago. she had knee replacment surgery, had her own couple of scares with possible cancer after annual female exams, lost her sister to throat cancer, two very good friends to pancreatic cancer. was in a veh accident where she got hit by a fully loaded 18 wheel gravel truck (AND WALKED AWAY WITHOUT A SCRATCH). her message (when i can get her to open up to me) is that one or both of us is allways sick.
yes i have considered counselling, and she knows the options we have available to us. simply put, she doesnt think she needs counselling. i would go myslef, and i have in the past, without her. if you know anything, you know that if a person is to change that change has to come from within themselves, not from anyone else.
your right about the lonliness, i most certainly am. but this has been a very long time coming. and i am not entering into this unaware or unadvised. i simply want to explore and learn more about the lifestyle. it very well could be that it is not for me, but who the heck knows.
i cant talk to her, she doesnt open up to me. ive never hit her, only actually yelled i can count on less that one hand the number of times. ive been there for her and with her thru every thing. all this she freely admits to and acknowledges. but she just will nto open up and tell me whats on her mind and in her heart. just drives me nucking futs (my attempt at humor)
by the way, im house trained, have had my shots, and i dont bite (unless upon request)