I don't visit PN's family, well part of it, if I can possibly help it. Nor would I be entirely interested in poker. In fact there is not a lot that we like that is similar, yet we love each other and stay together. We like to dance sometimes, but he likes to go home WAY earlier than I so usually dance around at home with LB (our boy). We have a great stereo for such dancing. We like to look at videos on line together. I read his tarot cards the other night for our date night.
We FIND things to do together and sometimes we HAVE to do stuff we don't want to. Mostly though I make it up to him in other ways when I don't want to do something and he does with me. It works along side our other relationships well. Or would if he had a partner right now
I think that people are mostly reading in to what this woman is thinking/feeling here. Maybe she is like me and is just fine with her independent life yet loves you avoidscauliflour. I don't think it has anything to do with monogamy (although what you are rerquiring of a partner does tend to be a monogamous perspective). I think its more to do with the nature of your relationship. Maybe you need someone more compatible. Maybe you need to think about what she says and go about finding more friends and possible other partners to spend time with doing some of what you like. I would think more friends would be a better option here. Especially for poker.
I agree with the idea of finding friends and creating community around you actually. It seems to be the best bet for getting ones social needs met. I wouldn't be putting this on her. Good for her sticking to her guns and not becoming co-dependent because you want her to do certain stuff with you. Find what she and you both like to do and do those things instead. Get her talking about things you DO like to do together.