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Old 01-07-2012, 06:41 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
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Well, first of all, don't "become bisexual" for him. Think about how another woman would feel if you were going down on her not because you wanted to but because you were appeasing him. She would feel like shit, and like a disposable toy. So, don't even go there. It's the most illogical, immature, disrespectful thing anyone could do and I can't even fathom why you'd consider it. Geez.

As far as your next conversation, I would lay it all out. That eventually you want another lover, and you want him to know that for you love "doesn't have to be limited to two people."

See, all you can do is tell a partner what you want and let them decide if they can live with it. If yes, then you negotiate how to make that comfortable, and what incremental boundaries get established, which later get renegotiated until everyone has what they want. No one should be giving each other ultimatums.
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"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 01-07-2012 at 07:08 PM.
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