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Old 01-05-2012, 04:50 PM
Vinccenzo Vinccenzo is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 373

Originally Posted by vanille View Post
He loves me more than anything. I know he does. He supports me through school which is a big deal. Before March, we split everything 50/50. We paid our half when it came to living. Combining our finances (where he had nothing to gain and everything to lose) was a big deal. Me not working at all was a big deal. We don't even believe in social welfare (at least not as expanded as it is right now). Our personal beliefs are that you work hard for what you get. We grew up surrounded by alcoholics who expected handouts. We refuse to live that way.

So the fact that I didn't live up to my bargain is also a big deal. But he loves me and still supports me even when I fail. He's been very patient with me, dealing with my depression and bipolar and utter lack of wanting to do anything some days. All he asks is that I give it my best. Keep the house clean, cook the food, and do my best in school. In exchange, we live a very comfortable life that he worked his butt off to attain.

Aside from finances... I know he loves me. Like I said, he has dealt with my bipolar and constantly deals with me when I forget to take my medication and am extra moody and lazy. We aren't the same kind of people. I'm a Libra and he's a Leo... not that I strictly follow astrology, but for us at least the descriptions are almost spot on. I believe in equality, while he is a born leader. It can be tough to manage.

No relationship is perfect, but I'm in a safe home, protected and loved and provided for. We have open communication, even if we don't always agree. I don't have a lot of experience with relationships, but I'm not sure I could do any better. He is driven, hard working, and is only going to achieve great things. We practice compassion and empathy when we can (though I'm the one who usually has to point out the empathy hehehe). He doesn't physically abuse me and I really don't think he emotionally abuses me. He just struggles with empathy and consideration sometimes. But don't we all?
That he has worked his butt off to attain a particular standard of living is not only your benefit. He gets to enjoy the fruits as well. Should anyone here assume he would wish a lower standard of living than he now enjoys if you were not in his life? Please. And what you benefit by it really isn't seen in a healthy light if its looked at as a handout. You're suppose to be his partner in life and life isn't all about money unless you let it be.

I see these two situations completely separate. If he feels inequality in the monetary sphere that needs to be kept in discussions about finances and what things can be done to make things better monetarily. What on Earth does it have to do with affection or intimacy? I make more money so only I get to have intimacy with more people?!? I can't say I'm surprised by this mindset coming form someone who is comfortable with buying other peoples' bodies.................
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