Thread: North Dallas
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Old 12-31-2011, 08:13 PM
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NovemberRain NovemberRain is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Originally Posted by DC2B View Post
I am excited to find such a forum as this! I have never had the pleasure of such a relationship, however, a MFF triad to me seems perfect. I tend to be emotionally detached after the NRE has passed. It is more of an intellectual gap above all. I used to think I just did not like people. I found out recently I just dislike 'ignorant' people. By ignorant, I mean people who chose not to learn at their full potential, yet act as if they know it all..
Hi Jeremy, welcome.

Perhaps you just need to seek out smarter people? I met first bf (not first ever in my whole life, but man with whom I'm currently entering into a vee relationship) at mensa. He's an extreme introvert, and expresses that by saying 'I don't like people' Which sometimes upsets me, as I consider myself people, but everyone who's said that to me swears they mean 'not me.' Then I'm irritated because they're imprecise.

Originally Posted by DC2B View Post
I love being in love, but I prefer to stay single for the sake of any woman that may fall in love and get hurt. I was married for 7 years and it broke her... I dont ever want to do that to another lover.
I would encourage you to think about re-framing that. You didn't 'do' that 'to' her. You're just not that powerful. It was her mind making meaning out of your actions, and she chose negative, disempowering meanings (at least that's how it sounds to me). I say this from a place of been there, done that. I have an ex, when I am in his presence, my chemicals go unbalanced. It's much less severe than it was 20 years ago, but the fact that it still happens is a bit unnerving.

I appreciate that you want to be cautious and not hurt people unnecessarily, but I think you do yourself a disservice to hold back.

I'm interested to see if people have opinions for you on selfishness. I feel I can't speak to it as it seems to be a hot button for me.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein

Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who now lives in a house far away-with stairs I can't climb)
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