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Old 12-29-2011, 02:44 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,022

Well said, Anabel.

Even without veto power, there's always The Ultimatum. In my experience, relationships that exercise ultimatum power doom themselves. It's a bad sign when your arguments involve "Choose what I want or else I walk." Note the difference from "My needs in this relationship cannot be met under these circumstances."

The notion of veto power with no explanation or justification frightens me. That obviously indicates a lack of communication and abundance of insecurity. Our relationship couldn't function the way it does if we didn't understand the way the other one ticks. Anything serious in life requires explanation and justification, it's part of the deal when you're sharing a life together. I'm not talking about every little coffee date or new dress. But spend enough time with someone, you should know what's important to them and when they'd like to be consulted. If you have any trust and respect for them, you'll consider their concerns.
Gralson: my husband. Auto: my girlfriend.
Zoffee: Auto's husband. Cue: Zoffee's boyfriend. Bookie: Cue's wife.

"Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. " -- Louis de Bernières
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