I feel for you. I hope Christmas went well.
I hope you post more on here. I'm wanting to know what your actions are? I feel not so alone knowing you have similar experiences...
I pushed B out of our relationship. I told T they could be friends. Just friends. It is going well. I met his family today finally.
I'm going to trust him.
I used to feel bad but I realized alot. I did things wrong but we all did. We did it and moved on. I accept it and try not to let it define me.
Look at it as an example. This is your one life. One life. Every minute gone is another minute you won't get back. Like the others said you gave love a chance. It ended badly yes (if ended).
But you can be strong. You already were through a lot of shit.
I think every moment (good or bad) is a minute worth living if good intentioned. You sound good intentioned, pissed but it's not like you want anything badly towards anyone. At times you probably wish R could be yours (and only YOURS) but what's wrong with being a little selfish, especially after sacrificing? But that's just wishing too. It's not like you pushed anything too much against W.
I hope you are well!!!!
I think no matter what you'll do I can understand, being there/having been there.
Me = needing self help