Thread: Hey guys :)
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Old 12-21-2011, 09:00 PM
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MindfulAgony MindfulAgony is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 192

Depends a lot on where you meet people. Some folks are comfortable meeting people in bars and the like and just laying it on them. I'm not so comfortable this way. So, I prefer to meet people socially generally (just doing the things I enjoy). And, when I have an interest in someone it feels more natural to talk about the whole gambit. Chances are I've already facebooked them and they already have a window into my life, etc.

The reveal about me in this way is more natural. I do it early on but it isn't like "Hey, you're an interesting person and I'm in an open relationship!" Instead, it's more like "hey, you're interesting and I'd enjoy getting to know you... friends or whatever."

This aligns with my overall approach to connecting with women. I treat every encounter as such as a possible friend primarily and a potential partner secondarily. Takes a ton of the pressure off for me. And, allows me to be open about polyamory without feeling like everything is on the line. Some have remained friends and not further because of it. Some I don't talk to any longer. Some have become more than friends.

Works well for me.
Male, Straight, Poly

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“Instead of getting better and better at avoiding, learn to accept the present moment as if you had invited it. And work with it instead of against it. And making it your ally rather than your enemy.”
-Pema Chodron
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