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Old 12-21-2011, 03:24 AM
STBF STBF is offline
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 11

Originally Posted by dingedheart View Post
do you feel passion for any person or activity now? Have you had that in the past and have lost that?
No. I've never been a passionate person.

Originally Posted by liberumcredo View Post
Could you describe what you are feeling for each of the women in your life?

Another thing that would help is to know what you think would be different / better without these women in your life. Are you afraid of going back into your old dependent ways? Do you just not see the point of the relationships now that you no longer have the deep needs for external validation? Are you looking for more freedom / experience? Ok, I will stop putting words in your mouth, but if we don't know what your needs are we will have a hard time offering useful advice.
I think that I love both women deeply, but it could just be limerence with my gf. I'd have to wait another few months, before confirming it either way. Realistically, I also think that love isn't enough to sustain a relationship.

Please continue putting words in my mouth. You're spot on with what I'm feeling.

Originally Posted by Butternut View Post
The way your posts are worded, it seems to me that in your heart, you already know what you want to do (leave) but are struggling with feelings of guilt and the knowledge that even if leaving turns out to be 'the right thing' to do, it will be painful, whether you do it now, or at a later 'better' moment...
Thanks. I'll admit that I don't really understand the stigma surrounding break ups. I would expect them to be bittersweet but not horrible.

For me, it was basically my codependency that led me to enter a deep depression after my past breakups. I don't think that my wife and gf are codependent.
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