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Old 12-20-2011, 10:51 PM
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SoCalExile SoCalExile is offline
Join Date: Jul 2011
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Posts: 35

Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
What can you do to help her re-assure her fears that are triggering the feelings of jealousy?
That's a great question and one I don't know how to answer. I'm hoping the MFT can assist with that. The only thing I can think of is to keep telling her I love her. While that's great and all, it's pretty short on specifics, isn't it? At some point it's just going to sound like a platitude.

She's asked me some very direct questions like "how many lovers do you think you'll end up having?" and "will you wear a condom?" and "will you be spending the night elsewhere a lot?" (!)* These are flustering me and while I actually have thought about them and do have answers I'm afraid of triggering more jealousy with them and seeing things spin out of control. I'm very conflict-avoidant and, as I've mentioned before, don't want to lose her. That would be a disaster.

So here's to hoping couples therapy will help me/us navigate that.

* I can't believe she's even entertaining this sort of notion this early. She's really facing things head-on.
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