Well, and there's no one pressuring me, really. Mainly, I've just got two voices in my head. One that wants to go for it and one that's not sure. I come from a Christian background and I'm pretty sure that's one of the big reasons why I've had a lot of hesitations over the years. All of the religious anxiety has finally lifted.
I think it's very possible that if I went more casual I could regret but at the same time part of me really is curious. Maybe the birth control is making me hornier?? Lately, I've actually been turned on by the thought of having vanilla sex. That never used to happen!
And that's a good point about the labels. Part of me wants to have it all figured out but I guess i can't expect everything to be all neat and tidy like that. I still have a lot to learn about myself. And changing to do.
I think I might get some condoms just in case though.