I was going to go through all previous threads dealing with boundaries but then realized this might not be the best thing to do. Why? Because it looks as if you are asking for an "operator's manual" for a polyamorous life. There are so many ways to approach poly and so many different personalities involved that we can't even agree on what poly is or isn't lol! Boundaries, rules, dynamics, relationship structures are so various there is no set way of negotiating or guidelines that can be applied across the board. Communication and honesty is the only thing that seems to be a constant in all these relationships.
While it is good to read and learn from other people's experiences, it is up to each individual to really discovery why they want things, how they can achieve them and what boundaries they will need to develop to achieve their personal goals...because they are personal.
When people ask how to justify thier interest in poly to a partner I used to offer some advice...now I just put that back on them. IMO if you can't come up with logical, understandable and genuine reasons for wanting something..then you don't want it for the right reasons. There are some things that others simply can't understand however...in those cases you just have to find acceptance.
Playing the Game of Life with Monopoly rules.
Monogamy might just be in my genes
Poly Events All Over
Last edited by MonoVCPHG; 11-09-2009 at 06:04 PM.