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Old 12-07-2011, 07:00 PM
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Anneintherain Anneintherain is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Seattle-ish
Posts: 826

Originally Posted by Lila View Post
Anyway, I said I can't agree to this right now because then what would be your incentive to work on OUR relationship? NONE!
Yes, that, and my signature sums up the main problem with this. He isn't appreciating you, he isn't working on your relationship. Besides waiting until April, he should be taking you out on dates, talking through problems, and doing the hard work to make you happy and comfortable.

The way he acts in the next several months is going to set the tone for if there is any chance for poly to be successful if you decide you are open to it. If he starts dating somebody else and is ignoring you but hanging on their every word and romancing them while (possibly) ignoring your newborn (let alone that the time to start a new relationship really isn't when you need to be at home with your wife and baby, making sure you're there to take care of them when your partner is exhausted).

I really hope he will pay attention to what you're saying, and if you could find a poly friendly counselor, they might be able to ask some sensible questions he'd actually listen to instead of glossing over your feelings due to his dreamy ideas about how poly will fix everything.
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
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