View Single Post
Old 12-07-2011, 01:40 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

I just received a message on OKC which totally charmed me. Unfortunately, he lives too far away from me. But everything about his message and profile makes me wish that were not the case. Indeed, he's a 90% match.

What did I find charming about his message? Hmm...
First paragraph: He started off with a reference to something I joke about in my profile, by making cute & funny comments about it. He then tells me he is in an "ethical polyamorous relationship" and would be happy to introduce me to one of his partners, who is also on OKC. This is a second reference to my profile, where I say that I am not interested in married men who are not in ethical poly relationships (I was getting propositioned by lots of cheaters for a while). He's unmarried but it's obvious that his statement was a response to what I'd put out there, and so I know he read my profile, or at least the section down at the bottom.

Next paragraph: He tells me I am "clearly a beautiful woman" and that he loves my hair. Then he says he just reminded himself of an old song by saying that -- and he added a line of lyrics. That was sweet! He then tells me that my shape "works for him" and remarks how he doesn't understand the notion that for a woman to be beautiful, she must "resemble a stick figure." This whole paragraph also references items I talk about in my profile - my hair and my curves. And it was all expressed directly but very respectfully.

Last paragraph: He says that the "real reason" he wrote me is because he likes my "turn of mind." He states that the quotes I have in my profile "resonate" with him, "especially the poem." He then tells me that I am "obviously very bright" and sees me as "capable of engaging the world" on my terms. Because of this, he says, he thinks we can be good friends.

His closing talks about us being "geographically challenged," but that he hopes I would like to be a penpal.
The message made references to my profile or pictures all the way through, and so it felt personal. He referred to me as a woman, not a girl. As a man in his early 60s, he came across as breezy, confident, and playful. Even though he gave me compliments on my appearance, those comments weren't cheesy and didn't seem calculated at all. He made it clear that he was mostly moved by my intelligence, which he thought was evident in some of the things I wrote in my profile. His writing flowed naturally, like a conversation. Charming, charming, charming.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.

Last edited by nycindie; 12-07-2011 at 02:00 AM.
Reply With Quote