Originally Posted by polymusing
what has been people's experience with that? Has it been a good thing? So-so? Not good?
I just joined this week and it was suggested that I have my husband come and read here. I am contemplating it - but I have some concerns (besides the one I mentioned before - there are a lot of "problems" being mentioned - and I know that's the nature of the forum beast).
Okay, it's funny, as soon as I start typing my concern, I can hear responses already - my first one was going to be - what about being able to speak freely and openly - but that's my goal, right? I know I have a lot of work to do along these lines with my husband (he comes from a long line of "no need to talk about its"). Maybe having him come and read (and maybe just maybe post himself???) would help that. But I'm afraid I would edit/censor what I say if I knew for sure he was reading (that's just me and I don't like that but it's what I do).
My lover (that's how I've started thinking of him even though it's just emotional right now) has expressed interest in joining me here. He has his own questions. I would like that, but I almost feel like I should invite both of them at the same time. Is that necessary? Is that just me wanting to control things? Sometimes I think too much.
I invited Maca (husband) and GreenGecko (boyfriend) to come here if they so pleased. GG was pretty adamant that he really does not have time (no argument in that department). He posted once when I pointed out that a question was raised in a way really only he could answer (about our situation). Maca popped on, started reading and found himself THRILLED to have unrelated people who he could talk with.
He was NOT impressed with the poly thing when it was him and I talking-but reading here has totally impressed upon him how HIS attitude was making things harder for himself and how changing how he dealt with things could make things run smoothly. It also showed him how other people we know are screwing up their monogomous relationships!
I do have to force myself sometimes to "just write it!" because I FEEL like sensoring my words sometimes, but less with each passing week.