Thanks for all the input.
Just to clarify, these are requests, not demands. If she doesn't feel like these are reasonable or she can't honor them for whatever reason, then we will discuss until we get to where we need to be.
Mostly, these requests are about me, not her. I have no doubt that she will be where she says she will be and I do trust her. These requests are things that will make me feel.... safer? more secure?
I don't want to be up all night and I especially don't want to be up all night wondering when she is going to come home... but I know I will. I've fallen asleep next to her every night for the past five years. That's not a habit I can suddenly break, no matter how much I want to.
I don't want her to call me and ask if she can stay out later... I know myself well enough that I will say "sure, that's fine" regardless of how I feel (not so good with communicating emotions, especially in the moment). I don't want to be dishonest so I figure I will address it now, rather than later. The main thing is, I don't want to be asked--that's a decision she needs to make on her own.
I suspect that I will have different requests and reasons for those requests, six months in the future. But for now, this is where I need to start.