Hi! If you find it useful, I would class you as "genderqueer". You can ID as female and still explore your male leanings with your current partner or with others and have a lot of fun.
It sounds like you're very sensitive to your partner's feelings and reactions, which is awesome. I hope you also have space to express your needs and desires?
The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.