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Old 11-29-2011, 08:13 AM
cagedbutterfly cagedbutterfly is offline
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Outter Space
Posts: 30

So today was a better day I guess.

R came to work and had a full/productive day. He is still there at the moment.
I know he goes to China for 2 weeks next monday so I do know that he is busy and not avoiding spending time with me.

He wants to come to an information evening at a school I want to go to tomorrow night so that is a good thing.

He and W want to sit down and talk some more about things before he goes away. I don't know how open I am about this. I know that I am at a point where I will not compromise on NYE or the holidays after then.
This time is important to me, and to the success of our relationship.

Going on holidays is not a luxury afforded to me, and they have taken LONG holidays together before, and they will again this year. For me this isn't really an option.

Its hard in my head counting down the hours I will get to see him until the new year, because I literally can count them. And there are not alot. I think its 5 days so that says a lot I guess.

With how the weekend situation has been going we were meant to be spending Saturday together but that hasn't worked out.
R has a family christmas gathering on Saturday. R invited me and said that we could go together (as Saturday was our day) and then W would join us there if she was free and then leave separtely.

Yeah that would NEVER happen. W wouldn't accept that in a million years.
I don't really feel like I want to go at this point because of everything being up in the air. I met some of his extended family a few weeks ago, and I have met his parents briefly. The look on their faces when they realised I wasn't W was kinda priceless. I guess I should make a T-shirt that says "I'm not W"
if I was going to go.

In all seriousness, R is not that close with his extended family so going to the party I think would only exagerate the stress and issues we are all having at the moment.

So the plan is that R and I will do something in the morning. Then he and W will go to the party for a few hours, and then R and I will spend the night together also doing something nice.

Sunday I expressed that I NEEDED to spend most of the day with him as it was going to be a tough day for me. I think in a way he has accepted that and will try and spin it to W. Personally I don't think he'll pull it off like he plans. She will turn up early. I will get upset.

I know a lot of my thoughts come off as negative, but I just haven't had the best experience. A lot of the time he just gets TOLD what he will be doing, and when he will be doing it. He chooses to accept that, and well. I don't.
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