Originally Posted by Anneintherain
I can be a sub through and through with a partner, but that doesn't mean that they will be topping me in anyway other than sexually, and I haven't experienced it outside of the bedroom. So I didn't automatically assume that sexually submissive means relationally submissive from what ChloeJane said.
If you're only a sub in a sexual context, you're technically a bottom. If someone is only a Dom in a sexual context, they are technically not Masters/Doms, or Mistresses/Dommes, but Tops.
Since CJ is calling the shots as far as not just the sex, but also the messaging allowed between her h and their gf, she is Domming outside the bedroom/dungeon context. Her h might not be her sub fulltime, he might be. He seems to be a bratty sub though, that's for sure! I think he needs a good flogging or other kind of punishment, besides scolding, myself.
It sounds to me like they could use a good read, or support group, about the intricacies of D/s dynamics.
I am not a lifestyle D/s player, I'm merely a horny Switch, but my gf has had years of experience in lifestyle D/s and I am sure she'd agree to my assessment. At least with the info we have so far...
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
Mags (poly, F, 60) loving miss pixi (poly, F, 38) since January 2009, living together since 2013
also loving Punk (monogamish, 42, M) since Oct 2015
"Master," (mono, 34), miss pixi's Dom for 2 years