Originally Posted by Michele
... I feel I need to redefine the type of relationship that my husband and I have. We have been in an open marriage for many years now, but on my side things have changed. I want to have more of a relationship with someone else and if it happens fall in love with them without having it make things to complicated. My husband does not want to meet or know anyone that I have on the side, so that is where it might get complicated.
Is this possible???
I have a few questions (okay, more than a few
). When you describe your situation as an open marriage, what does that mean, exactly? How do you two approach being open? It doesn't sound like you two were doing things together, like swinging. It sounds more like you can both individually have casual sex partners, but only with a DADT policy. Do you never talk to each other about your extramarital activities? Does his not wanting to meet or know anyone you fuck mean that you have to sneak around, or does he know when you are going to meet up with someone? Do you know when his exploits take place, and do you want to know more about his sexual liaisons? Have either of you had a sex partner for long-term? Is your husband open to discussing things or does he clearly want to look the other way and will not budge on that? What do you think would happen if you did allow yourself to develop an emotional, loving connection with someone else, and didn't keep him informed (since he doesn't want to know anything)? Would you be okay with his developing a romantic love relationship as well?
I am just asking all of this to get a better picture of your situation so we can help with more definitive suggestions.