Originally Posted by redpepper
I think after a number of years we are much more relaxed and free flowing. We know each other well at this point and take everything very slowly and pace ourselves. No stone is left unturned and there is room to just be ourselves even if sometimes we feel like the other is coming from a different planet on some stuff. At this point we just let that be and love/respect/care for each other regardless.
To me this is ideal. I see the utility of hard rules, especially in the establishment phases of things and always about safety, but to be able to say "we operate with love, honesty, respect, common sense, introspection, compassion, and communication, and that is more than enough to make it work for everyone and leave us with just a few, simple, mutual agreements that can change as needed" is a lovely vision and goal.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.