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Old 11-27-2011, 05:44 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

I understand that things are working okay now, but I am a bit nervous here. I would love to hear from your husband on this. Maybe I am wrong, but I kinda get this feeling that hubby is agreeing to boundaries that he struggles to keep and wishes were different for some reason.

I know he can talk for himself and is on his own journey with this, but I wonder how much he doesn't want to rock the boat because he thinks you might not allow him to have sex with your girlfriend alone sometime down the road. I respect that he might be going at your pace here ChloeJane, but is that what is going on or is he in denial about what he really wants. I just get the feeling that he just sucked up his feelings, thoughts and desires to keep you happy. Maybe he thinks he will be denied all of the sex he is having if he expresses how he really feels. Men sometimes do that when it comes to sex. Hell women to. We all do sometimes when we are getting some of our needs met. It sometimes seems worth it to shelve some stuff in order to get just one need met. I don't think this is healthy in the long run. Even if it is shelved with the knowledge that it will be addressed later that is better than ignoring it I think.

Is it not possible to go off in twos sometimes and then come together in threes? When was the last time you and he connected alone sexually. This is also important to the stability and foundation of your connection with him too no? Are you interested in sex with her alone? I realize this is all new, but eventually I am wondering if this will all bust apart if the move to something more stable doesn't occur.... or is that something that you are considering but just later?
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