Originally Posted by mcmctalk
I suppose it's also the evil social conditioning thing again, that somehow I feel like I "earned" my status to enjoy these social comforts and he kind of just swooped in and is pretending to be her boyfriend. I don't know, it's annoying to think about.
Wow, you've got great self-insight going on already. It IS annoying to think about sometimes - like, it makes me uncomfortable, isn't that enough? Wherever there's discomfort, there's the capacity for self growth and great communication with your partner. You might end up having the same boundary in the end, but at least you will feel totally at peace about it and both people will feel totally understood. Sometimes being understood and accepted is enough to make the boundary uneccesary in the end, but I don't think that you need to push, push, push all at once, either.