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Old 11-24-2011, 09:31 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,413

I agree with the "it's real" verdict.

For me, it was actually more of a "click" one day. It helped to experience reality instead of hypotheticals. In other words, a lot of my insecurities were based on "what if this, what if that" without actually getting into those situations and finding out what if. When I saw with my own eyes that my partner could be with someone else, and still come home to me with just as much love and passion as he had when he left (actually, more), then I started to live more in reality than hypotheticals.

I think it's a lot about letting go... letting go of cultural norms, fears, preconceived notions, and anxiety. Let yourself trust.

It also has to do with finding a partner whom you can trust. Let's face it, not everyone who wears the polyamorist button is good at doing it. Some people make it hard to trust them, behave selfishly, and generally don't look out for your well-being. Of course, plenty of people do that in monoamorous relationships also.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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