Originally Posted by nooneparticular
I know it's not a race, I just feel ready to find someone and now that I am nobody is talking to me. I've talked with some really wonderful people and been shot down. I've always been a bit shy around women.
You and your wife just started looking for other partners, correct? What has it been, a few weeks? To say that now you are ready but no one is talking to you... how much time have you given it? It could take months, as I said before. It could even take years before you meet someone with whom a meaningful relationship takes hold. Patience is key.
Dating = rejection. You need to get used to being turned down more often than something starting up if you are going to date. That's just the way it is. So maybe you need to find a way to develop a thicker skin right now. It's okay to be shy. Shy people still meet other people, but being overly sensitive will only make you feel worse.
What are some of the things you like to do, places you like going to? Try meeting people who might have a shared interest with you.