Sounds like issues are going on both ways here.
I would hold a meeting and compromise. Set some boundaries (just remember forbidding your partner from doing something just because you are jealous isn't right). Ask for a little more reassurance from her that she still needs you too. She sounds like she is in NRE to me and that is tough for everyone to go through. Are you actively seeking a partner too? It might help if you aren't. I also agree that you and your wife should read xeromag it was very helpful in easing fears for me and my partners.