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Old 11-20-2011, 07:19 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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While I do agree with everyone who's said that moving a lover in with you after only a few months is something akin to lunacy, I just want to point out that there are Vees that live together. Several members here are in Vees that cohabit. However, you should know that in the ones that work well, nobody rushed into anything. I think it goes without saying that it takes thoughtfulness, very small steps at a time, and lots and lots of honest communication (usually for at least a year) for any cohabiting situation to work. I think your excitement has gotten ahead of you, and sped past real, practical considerations. Also, yeah, I second SC's recommendation to explore all your feelings about your wife having a male lover, before entertaining the notions of having lovers yourself.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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