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Old 11-04-2009, 03:50 PM
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rosevett rosevett is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Finger Lakes Region of NY
Posts: 135
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I seem to get the same mix of responses from my co-workers as I (and now we) come out. For the most part it's the elephant in the room(truly) and occasionally the 'how can you do that I can't even take care of one man' or 'I can't even get one man' ENVY I'll call it to make myself feel good about having a wonderful life.

Anyway the (now we & truly) are because my partner of almost 3 yrs now works in the same building with me. I have worked here for 4 and most people know me even in the other departments so we are pretty much in their face, specially when my other partner comes for lunch or drops in.

Most of my immediate co-workers have know for sometimes now as we walk at lunch and well talk about life. They all knew Richard from the beginning and really like him, he is a wonderful man.

Here is the story of the actual coming out EVENT

Well I would talk about Martin this and Martin that and still be talking about Richard...one day only 2 of the 3 of us were walking and she asked me 'Who is Martin?' I said 'My other boyfriend' she said 'Oh!' and I fumbled through 'it's a lifestyle that we live and have been for over 2 years and there is are SUPPORT(dumbass, we don't need support like AA)groups for it.'

After fumbling through any sort of logically this is Polyamory there was a bit of ackward silence and then after a bit more we went back to small talk. I never brought it up again, thought if and when they want more info then they will ask but I wasn't going to stop talking about both of my guys.

After realizing that I was still the same ol' me and nothing was different or changed even in the knowledge of knowing they both would ask questions and I LOVE sharing so would tell bits and pieces of how things worked out with family arrangements and how the guys are great about it.

The girls at work even were part of the storying telling as we went through a small tradegy and seen the support I got from the family as a whole.

We got invited to one of their holiday parties. The invite came addressed to Elaine & family. I RSVPed with 'about your party' she said 'OH YA wasn't sure how to address it so you're all invited' I said thanks and it's FOUR now, as Richard had a g/f by that time. I got a 'oh my, I'll have to hear about this, but of course you are all welcome to come.'

Martin has not 'come out' in his department. Most of his coworkers do not really know I have a boyfriend or if they do they probably think I have done a trade in(lol) but they do know we are dating and that we live together. I am sure the more Richard shows up the more questions will be asked, he's not a volunteer information kind of guy but he does dance around answers.

I am coaching him with 'It's a unique relationship'.
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