Yeah, the whole "poly as a backup for failed monogamy" is a terrible joke. If he's worried about messing up one relationship, wouldn't two relationships double his chances for messing it all up and being left with nothing?
I don't like feeling like he has an escape or backup plan while I face the emotional risk by myself. Is this out of line? or typical for a poly? Thanks for any light y'all can shine on my situation.
I wouldn't like feeling like that either. Yes, in my opinion, this is out of line. No, this is not typical for a poly. We have a saying around here, if you can't even handle one relationship properly, you have no business trying to manage more than one. This ties into his "escape plan" and is really more of a reason why you would "date" multiple people at once, not "be in a romantic relationship" with them.