View Single Post
Old 11-19-2011, 06:45 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Hmm, "cutting your losses" to avoid any confrontation... seems like it should be easier than discussing the issues that bother you. Yet, even taking the supposedly easy way out is difficult for you. This is a good indicator of an area you might want to work on and hone your skills in your relationships (basically -- communicating). Why not use this as an opportunity to push those boundaries of yours and actually talk to her about the things that have bothered you? It doesn't have to be a confrontation, it can just be a conversation, or a request. You never know - she might also be uncomfortable with feeling like she is a taker, but doesn't know how to offer.

But if you really feel like you've let things slide too long and the only way out of the situation you created (by not speaking up) is to break it off, then I think simple and straightforward is the way to go. You don't need to go into a litany of problems just to tell someone you don't feel it's working for you anymore. Break-ups suck no matter how gentle, and so all you can do is be as nice and respectful as you can.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.

Last edited by nycindie; 11-19-2011 at 06:47 AM.
Reply With Quote