I've been really happy with my local poly community in B'more. The people who help lead it have done a good job of welcoming anyone who may have an interest in ethical non-monogamy - swingers, pagans, kinksters - while acknowledging that those communities often overlap but are not the same as poly. As a result, there are events that range from kinky play parties to more 'vanilla' sex parties to discussion groups and movie nights. So I generally know what I'm getting myself into when I go to an event and can decide if that is for me. Here, it is ok to be looking for people to date at events, if one is tactful, understand 'no means no' and don't expect everyone else to be looking for dates. There is quite a bit of cross pollination with poly folks in and around DC too.
And, yes, sometimes I don't have anything in common with the other poly folks I meet at events. That's life. I often don't have much in common with other kinky folks or people who like history or dogs or tea. But we can chat like heck about those particular topics. And for me that is enough.
Last edited by opalescent; 11-18-2011 at 01:31 AM.