Originally Posted by AnnabelMore
Ok, I feel the need to say we've been kind of inundated lately with stories of cheating and unsafe practices. Most of them have nothing to do with D/s. Yes, that's an aspect of the OP's situation, so it makes sense to factor it in, but most doms wouldn't act like this and most subs wouldn't take it.
Oh, I know, I know, I know, blablabla. Calm down, I get it. I was simply stating my opinion, and it is just my opinion, okay. You don't have to go around defending D/s every time someone cites something they don't like about it. I can hold two opposing views at the same time - my own personal distaste for it on one hand and understanding how it can benefit some people on the other. I was basically agreeing with you! Even though I have no D/s experience, it was pretty obvious that he was not domming ethically and with care and concern for the OP as his sub. I don't need to be scolded or schooled if I say D/s doesn't appeal to me because of someone who abuses his dominant position.
a factor in this case because he used it as an excuse to say she couldn't complain about his actions. Guys like him just add to the cringe factor for someone like myself who tries understanding the draw of that kind of arrangement. I cringe not so much about D/s itself but more about the kinds of creeps and damaged individuals that glom onto alternative sexual practices and wind up doing harm. Because of that, there is an extra need to be careful about who to be involved with, to stay safe. I can see that with the right people who have their heads screwed on straight, it can be safe and enjoyable. I think it's more a comment on societal attitudes toward sex in general that make practices like D/s (not just D/s, okay) appeal to people who aren't always as ethical or right in the head as they should be -- especially before entering into an agreement where they are dominating someone else. Ugh.