Originally Posted by AnnabelMore
It's not just a sex thing OR just a poly thing, of course. My ex, Ziggy, loved spontaneity whereas Davis gets antsy when things aren't planned out, and sometimes I'll call Davis up with a whacky, spur-of-the-moment plan and get confused when he's not enthused the way Z would have been.
Just a suggestion: Before telling Davis of the "whacky plan", warn him this is a spur-of-the-moment thing and give him a couple hours to processes it, ie "I had this whacky idea ..., think about it and I call you back in a hour or so". For those of us who don't do spontaneous really well, we can be trained that some spontaneity is good, but it's a sloooow process.
My husband, even after 20 years can get my likes/dislikes mixed up with other peoples, his sister, his bff ...