Thread: I'm so confused
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Old 11-04-2009, 12:38 AM
Nevins Nevins is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 2

Originally Posted by rolypoly View Post
Sorry, but the first thing that screams out at me with your post Nevins, is safety!!! Your wife thought your best friend was the father. This makes me wonder, were they protected? Tested? She wants to reopen the relationship now that she can go back on birth control. Unprotected?

Just be careful...
Safety is always first. The paternity situation arose from a broken condom and it couldn't be helped, plus a missed pill. The question of who was the father was because of us having sex within a couple days of each other and I never wear a condom with my wife. I am the father, thank God. Now she is on birth control, Mirena to be exact, which is probably the most effective since she doesn't have to worry about taking a pill now and it lasts up to 5 years. We always make sure to use protection or we don't do anything at all.

I've been tearing myself apart trying to sort through my feelings the last 48 hours. I love my wife, and I believe I also love her cousin. I revealed this love before she left to go home in January after her and I being together, and hanging out for nearly 2 months and only having sex twice. We lost touch for about 5 months, but I thought of her every day. Now she is moving here to be near her family. We have been talking online for the last 2 months, which is how long my wife and her boyfriend have been talking. Her cousin also revealed to me she also has deep feelings towards me. My wife and her boyfriend developed a very close friendship over these last 2 months, and I've overcome the jealousy of them spending so much time together. Only recently on Halloween night did they have their first sexual encounter. As far as her saying I could listen from the next room, well we haven't actually asked her boyfriend if I could be in the room or join yet, we are working our way into that. And for my wife being present while I'm with her cousin, well she can watch but I don't believe there will be a threesome there of course because she is family. I don't believe we will ever be in a quad situation.

So my situation is not based on sexual encounters, although they may happen from time to time. I like spending time with her cousin and my wife likes spending time with her boyfriend. We are only seeing one person each, although I had the one encounter with the lady a month ago when we were drinking. That wasn't planned, it just happened. I guess some would call this an open marriage, although I'm not sure if I would call it that or polyamory, since all of this is new to me. Of course I have no one to talk to about this because my family is religious and wouldn't understand, and neither would any of my other friends.
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