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Old 11-13-2011, 11:29 PM
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Arrowbound Arrowbound is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Tri-State
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Originally Posted by lifetake2 View Post
Ok, been lurking for a while but 1st post as I'm trying to wrap my head around some changes going on. I'm a Type-A and normally like things orderly and neat and nothing about this fits that. I'm just looking for reassurance (or otherwise) from someone more experienced that what is happening is normal-ish and if anyone can help me put a label on our relationship changes.

My story: male, married 14 years to an amazing wife. Over the last year my wife, developed a very close relationship with a female friend, C, which evolved into her moving into our home and ultimately the realization that they both love each other. They are both straight and the relationship is very deep but emotional only. (To clarify, there is contact & teasing between them but aimed at me; they both state no spark with each other unless I'm involved).

At some point after realizing the depth of their relationship, my wife initially proposed we open up a physical relationship with myself & C, thinking more along the lines of a FWB for me while allowing them the emotional connections. All along we assumed this was a 'season' and would end at some point as none of us went into it looking for this.

This has/is working, however, it is becoming clear this has potential to be more long-term. With that C & I have just begun to explore the emotional side of our relationship with my wife's support and encouragement.

I'm not sure where we go from here, but my gut tells me this could become a long-term relationship where the difference/hierarchy between wife & friend would dissolve into a equal relationship with all 3 of us.

so....any red flags, any thoughts, is this just an extension of our existing poly-ness or some drastic change?

Thanks for listening.....
Your wife's initial connection to her female friend resonates with me in the sense of that is how I would like to approach this when pursuing another partner, beginning with friendship above all else.
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