View Single Post
Old 11-13-2011, 05:07 PM
Arrowbound's Avatar
Arrowbound Arrowbound is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Tri-State
Posts: 275

Originally Posted by Eruza View Post
My opinion on jealousy is that it is similar to anger. It's okay to feel it, but you have to think carefully about how it determines your actions. I'm also not sure whether you want your husband-to-be to actually be in a long-term relationship with another woman; I can't really tell from what you've said thus far.
I haven't beat myself up for it, that's for sure. He and I spoke about it last night and he told me he was surprised I felt that way. I explained to him that though we may be very much alike we are still not the same person, and I also didn't anticipate feeling the jealousy like I did. I acknowledged the work needed on my part to examine what lay underneath and after a long talk I realize that what I needed was reassurance. I honestly feel normal again, because that initial feeling of blindsidedness was shattered.

As for the long-term relationship desire, I'm still adjusting. More than anything I want happiness for all involved, which is why I'm examining and researching. I wasn't as open to building something separate friendship-wise with his other partner previously but now I see it as necessary. Instead of harping on initially seeing her as a silent adversary, with my readings she has become humanized.
Reply With Quote