Originally Posted by leslie
I have a question about herpes. My partner has just begun a relationship with a trans woman who has herpes. My partner has a pretty active case of psoriasis with sores on his legs and arms. Psoriasis is not a contagious disease, but I am concerned about the partner with Herpes infecting my partner.
I am trying to get good information about this, but find everything a bit overwhelming. Somethings say people have inactive herpes, but you can still get infected, even if it is not an active case. I am confused. Any thoughts about how they can have safe sex?
I have to say that there is no way to have completely safe sex. It is easier for a man to give HSV-2 to a woman than vice versa. I "assume" that might go for a trans woman also, as it's somewhat about the amount of area coming into contact during intercourse.
Has your partner been tested for HSV already? up to 80% of people with HSV-2 don't know they have it. Antivirals help decrease transmission a lot, and a study they are doing now at the U of W (not published/finished yet I believe) shows that a daily isn't useful, but if you take it something like 12 hours before intercourse it will help prevent shedding during sex (in case they don't want to take it daily.) Hopefully that gets published soon.
Some of the better sites for information are
This one goes over the amount of risk from different activities
What seems to be a poly-ish thread on a discussion board about it.
One thing it says in there that I've seen (I think it was more like 1.7% but I can't seem to find the studies)
"I've heard people tell me after the fact that they didn't want to worry me by telling me they had HSV-2 when we were having protected sex because the risk was only 2% per incident when there is no outbreak and a condom is used during penis-vagina sex. I don't know where this 2% number comes from, but I've heard it more than once."