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Old 11-06-2011, 08:05 PM
suziesue suziesue is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
However, you then second-guess yourself - why feel guilty about bringing up something like this where a deception has been uncovered? It was not your fault that he felt "bad" or weird about what happened.
To clarify, the guilt was about him apologizing profusely to me for something that I didn't feel he could have done any differently. I told him it was ok and moved on from the subject because I didn't want him to blame himself for something that wasn't his fault.

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
What stands out to me, though, is that you are wondering if your relationship with Alan is messing this up with him and Bridget. It sounds like you thought that you should step back from seeing Alan if she is uncomfortable. But why? That is sort of saying that her relationship with him takes precedence over your relationship with him.
I see what you are saying with this, but its not really about precedence, or who relationship is more important in my head. It's a feeling of, 'if I am hurting someone I care about by doing X, then I should stop X'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
It sounds to me like all three of you would benefit from having a group discussion (on video I guess) and air out the dirty laundry. Shining the light of day on things can only do good, even if it's uncomfortable for a while. Best of luck.
I think you are right. I'll try to arrange this.
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