Me and Mya have kept discussions going about the topic I wrote about earlier, what love is. This has been very interesting. Firstly, we have uncovered some differences, and been able to describe our feelings to each other, and that has led to a greater understanding between us. Secondly, reflecting on her views has made it clearer to me how I love, and what I value.
For me the essence of love is not about passionate feelings, but more about the lasting things. For me, love consists of deep liking and caring for the person. I guess I'm not a terribly romantic person; not in the American movies sort of way (with candles and flowers and moonlight and dinners), and neither do I hold romantic love to be special with regards to other kinds of love but, rather, for me there really is only one kind of love. Obviously, I enjoy passion and all that, but that's not what love is about for me.
There was a bit of confusion around the feelings, though. When I say that I love all the people I do in the same way, I refer to the things that exist for me all the time: deep liking and caring. I don't refer to bursts of feelings. Thus, my love for a person feels different for each person. I have different depth, different passion, different affection with each person I love. However, there isn't a specific, romantic love for me, which would be only for my partners and another kind for everybody else I love. There is love, which manifests itself in different ways and different feelings with different people.
My attitude towards NRE is quite similar, I enjoy the good thing it brings, but I don't attach much value to it, because I know it won't last. The really good stuff, the real stuff starts afterwards. Not that NRE experiences aren't real and valuable in themselves, it's just that I attach more value to all that I can trust to last.
I find the individual differences in this area fascinating. I wanted to write about my view and feelings. If you wish, feel free to write about your way of loving, whether it's similar or different. Do you love your partners in the same way as your friends? Is romantic love different from other kinds of love? Are there, for you, different types of love? What are your feelings like, when you are in love?