Wow, that's so extreme on her part.
I'm sorry. I really can't think of any more you could do, she just needs to understand that people almost always need to ease into this and that your reaction is perfectly normal. If she values the marriage, she just needs to give things some time and it can totally work out. If her immediate comfort is the only thing that matters and she won't work with you to help you adjust... well, that's a real shame. Does she understand that she's proposing a permanent solution (divorce) to what's almost certainly a temporary problem (your unhappiness as you adjust to this brands new situation)?
Edit: Just noticed that autocorrect inserted "unfairness" where I meant to type "unhappiness"above... not what I was trying to say! You are being perfectly fair.
The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.
Last edited by AnnabelMore; 11-03-2011 at 04:32 PM.