Thanks for your advice AnnabelMore, it was really helpful
I will be sure to check out the website.
My boyfriend has encouraged me to talk to his other girlfriend more, and I agree that if we became closer it would be easier for both of us. I do hope it gets easier. I think that's my biggest fear - that my jealousy won't subside. It's like I know polyamory is right but it feels wrong at the moment. Strange how my head and my heart conflict!
To answer your question about the second bf, I know my current bf is very understanding and he doesn't have double standards so I'm free to do as I choose (which is another reason why I love him so much). If it happens it happens, but I don't want to complicate things so in a way I kind of hope it doesn't.