Of course they can be. My husband has a lower libido and doesn't consider sex an amazing positive thing (compared to me, don't know about he compares to the rest of the world). My self esteem plummeted after breaking up with my high libido-ed ex and ending up monogamous for some years with a guy who doesn't find the joy and happiness in sex easily, and feeling rejected.
This is the only reason I wanted to become actively poly again, and it has been very healing for me to be having sex with somebody who enjoys sex and finds it fun and a worthwhile activity to do often and with zest. And even though it was _the_ only reason I wanted to be poly again, I have found that there are lots of other benefits too. So no way do I discount men as sexual healers.
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
Last edited by Anneintherain; 10-21-2011 at 05:31 PM.