new to all this
so even though both my husband and i are bi, and we've each had separate same-sex relationships over the course of our years together, it only recently hit me that it sorta means i'm poly. duh. especially now that we have this semi-regular threesome thing going on with a female friend of ours.
i just ended a brief relationship i had with a woman i met on OKCupid this summer. she was my physical ideal but the emotional part of the equation was just missing -- but i fell in really far and really fast as i was so swept away by the sex being so much like my fantasies. i knew she was poly and knew she had a boyfriend in another town about 3 hours away -- and that was fine until he just recently started talking marriage and last week she announced her intention to move away to be with him in the spring.
we sorta decided we'd just have fun with our relationship until the time came for her to leave... but i realized i just couldn't do it, that the sex would feel humiliating, like i'd be begging for the dregs of her affection at this point. (that has a lot to do with her previous unavailability in general, not just that she's gonna go be with this guy.)
does that mean i'm not really cut out for this?
i don't know how to navigate all this -- it's never quite been an issue before and i don't know what my expectations should be or any of that.
so yeah, here i am. hi.