So my gal and I have been in the situation where I have a primary at home, but I was her only relationship. Knowing that sooner or later, she'd find that other person(s) I left space/time in how we interact from the get go.
So a month ago, we were pointed at someone and I encouraged my gal to go for it. Said person is very busy and so dates for them are 'catch as catch can'.
This week my gal scheduled a date with us both on the same day: My overnight date ending between 4 and 5 today, and her date with the other person starting a few hours later... Today.
I discovered something:
I apparently need a "one solo sleep rule".
The very idea of her seeing me and the other person on the same day makes my whole body go ooggie. Seriously, it's the most accurate term. I have a visceral gut roiling reaction of "Ick! Ewww! Gross!"
For me: Our date ends and even though I walk away, I'm still connected.
For her: Our date ends and when I walk away, I'm gone.
The challenge is this is a hard wiring/core values thing, I doubt either of us is going to change their views in this regard.