Originally Posted by MichelleZed
It looks like he's staying for the kids, because he wants to continue to co-parent with this woman. Except for co-parenting and finances, he is not married to her in any real sense (or at least that's what he's telling you).
I say go for it. Don't get caught.
It's not poly. But that doesn't mean it's wrong.
I agree on the ethical question, but like other posters have pointed out, that doesn't mean it's the right thing for the OP. If she really falls for this man, how hurtful might that be for her? She can never be out with him, lest his wife find out, she can never share in the special moments like holidays, never get to know his kids... hiding sucks.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.