How to Raise the Issue of Polyamory
I need some advice from you seasoned pros. I have been in a lesbian relationship with the same woman for 14 years. She has always been gay, I have never been with a woman prior to this relationship, but I have been married to a man before. The past 2-3 years, I have been craving the attention and affections of a man again. I love "Jean" with all my heart, but there is a certain emotional, sexual, psychological dynamic between opposite sexes that I miss.
We have a very close friend, Danny, who we call our husband. The three of us are best of friends, hang out together, are in the same business, etc. There is definately some sexual chemistry between Danny and myself. Jean has told me during our recent trials that if we break up, she would date Danny. He seems like he likes both of us for different reasons - I am adventurous, girly-girl, charismatic social butterfly while Jean is pragmatic, introverted and a workaholic. I see that he is attracted to both of us and respects our differences.
I really want to have a conversation with Jean about the possibility of us both dating Danny - but this is not the kind of conversation you have every day and I really don't what to say or where to begin. I am afraid she will feel threatened and just want to break up. However, I do feel a real need to spend time with a man. Part of that is because Jean works nights and I spend alot of time alone, and I would love the company of someone on those lonely nights.
Please feel free to offer any and all advice on how to proceed, or maybe you suggest I drop it entirely and just learn to be happy in my present circumstance. Whatever you have to say, I want to hear it!