Oh crap. I have been *such* an ass. See, this is why I like to turn things over and over in my mind, because it helps me catch the things that *should* be obvious.
It's bugged me that Davis is completely disinterested in Bee. I occasionally try to show him a super cute picture or tell him a funny story, and he's not mean about it but he just doesn't want to see/hear it. I want to stay a part of Bee's life no matter what, so in a way it's been hard not to take it personally.
When Davis and I were together the first time, years ago, we conceived accidentally and I had an abortion. We both agreed it was the right choice at the time. It was sad but I moved on completely and eventually I even became ok with telling people about it when the topic of women's reproductive rights comes up.
I found out about a year ago, to my surprise, that Davis still carries some lingering guilt and sadness about the whole thing. He's such a sweet, sensitive guy about a lot of things. :/
And here I am, falling in love with someone else's kid and trying to get him interested. And each time it probably makes him think of the fact that he and I could have been parents together and that we rejected the possibility.
Craaaaaap, I suck sometimes.
