View Single Post
  #7  
Old 10-10-2011, 01:00 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 8,451
Default

You're single and you're dating. The thing with the poly guy is very recent and new. It sounds like you've gotten a bit obsessed and needy about this relationship very soon, too soon. It's just infatuation, and if you are the type to have sex pretty early on when you meet someone (I am, too), this probably is part of your pattern, too. Jump in bed and get attached, ya know? Watch out for that attachment. See if you can disengage from that a bit.

If I were you, I wouldn't worry about whether you're poly or not, nor how to handle poly relationships. I think you need to get your feet back on the ground. Just consider the dating a stage where you get to know people and have fun. Do focus on other things in your life that bring you satisfaction and make you feel good about yourself. Go out with platonic friends. It's okay to date several people romantically, even if you are basically a monogamous person, but I think you're blowing things way out of proportion here. Give things time, date a few people, try not to let your head go off into the clouds about them, and see who really stands out for you to be in a serious relationship with after getting to know them. Good luck!
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 10-10-2011 at 01:03 AM.
Reply With Quote