Originally Posted by Podunk
I can't believe anyone will actually read this far, maybe someone will although I'm not sure why they would.
Errr... an addiction to this board, curiosity, drama?
I'm so sorry to hear about this. I can only imagine the pain and confusion you're going through.
I don't have a lot else to add, sadly. It sounds like VC thought she could do poly, and did fine in group situations, but veered way off course when she went solo. Maybe the lies were a leftover guilt thing from our culture's weirdness about exramarital sex?
The real kicker, of course, is that she lied to you and THEN slept with you, meaning you could have been exposed to something. Just... so not ok. I mean, obviously you know that, I'm just saying... I can see why you're so uninclined to try to reconcile right now.
Then again, I've seen couples go through worse, sort it out, and decide to stay together. Doesn't necessarily mean that should happen here. Still, 6 years is a long time. If I were you, I'd get away, stay somewhere else, clear my head. I'd also consider contacting Paul directly, maybe send him this thread to read.
Good luck, man.