i think that it is important if you want something long term,
montianboy did have a girlfriend for neary a year that refused to see me, we talked a couple of times via email but she was not ok with meeting me and at first this really bothered me but then i realised that he cared about her and i loved and trusted him enough to let him continue with that relationship and consider my needs too, regardless of the fact that i found it hurtful that she refused to meet me,
if the relationship was to get any more serious, they fell in love and she wanted to be a bigger part of his life i don't think it would work and in the end they split up becuase she was playing games,
perhaps friendship is not the most important thing, but to be able to talk understand and work through problems, respect each other is the most important thing,
have you thought about writing her a letter, explaining how you feel?